Q: What do you call a Spaniard with a rubber toe?
Q: What do you call a Spaniard with a rubber toe?
Each day I wish that my dreams will come true. Then I remember that I am now with you.
Taylor Swift waved at a boy yesterday and he didn’t wave back…
So she will have a new album coming out tomorrow.
Q: What do you get when you cross a Spaniard and an Iranian?
A: Oil of Ol’e.
What did the left butt cheek say to the right butt cheek?
You crack me up!
I like the night. Without the dark, we’d never see the stars. – Stephenie Meyer – Twilight
My chemistry teacher was talking about Hydrogen Bonding today.
Sounds like a lot of FON.
I found a Justin Bieber concert ticket nailed to a tree, so I took it!
You never know when you might need a nail.
Q: Why wasn’t Jesus born in Spain?
A: He couldn’t find 3 wise men or a virgin
There may be a billion yesterdays and a trillion tomorrows, but there is only ever one today. I would never let one day pass without letting you know that I am thinking of you.
A three-legged dog walks into a bar and says, ‘I’m looking for the man who shot my paw.’
I think I banged a Chinese celebrity
She kept screaming “I’m Wei Tu Yung” like I was supposed to know the name.
I was joking with my mailman, and said I had a package to ship to Spain…. to Parcelona…
He didn’t laugh though. The key to a joke like that is the delivery.
Nobody ever expects the Spanish ink precision.
I see the local baker was enjoying his mild celebrity status in the town paper after saving a drowning man..
He was acting really flan buoyant .
What do celebrity horses eat?
My girlfriend told me she was pregnant, so I started looking for some names…
…in the end I chose Juan Carlos and took the first flight to Spain.
Q: Who is the Spanish patron saint of shoes?
A: San Dalia.
I was walking along and this chair came flying past me, and another, and another, and I thought, man, is this gonna be a good night. – Liam Gallagher
We should have them in England.
Some celebrity’s have their own theme songs
Like Ellen with I’m coming out, or Bill Cosby with I wanna be sedated
Early sleep and early wake up gives health and makes you grow. – Portuguese Proverb
The one thing you shouldn’t be left alone with at night, is your own thoughts. They eat you alive until the next morning.
All I do each day is wait to be with you again. My entire day revolves around the hope that I can spend my evenings in your arms again.
If you could have sex with any dead celebrity, who would it be?
I’d choose Brittany Murphy because she’d still be relatively fresh.
The worst thing about celebrity deaths is the inevitable torrent of jokes referencing them from people trying to be witty when really it should be a time of mourning and respect. I won’t take any part in it.
So wake me up when it’s all over
Although I love the stars that dot the night sky, I love the stars in your eyes even more. While I sleep, I will think about my favorite stars and wait to be with you again.
They don’t expect a Spanish Link decision
My friend in Spain was wondering what the Nazi’s in the US had been up to recently
So I gave her a quick rundown.
Nobody expects the Spanish imp incision.
Why are Spain such a good football team?
Because no one ever expects The Spanish Inposition!
Those who dream by day are cognizant of many things which escape those who dream only by night. – Edgar Allan Poe
Take a breath and gaze up at the stars. See the two brightest stars? Those are my eyes twinkling back at you.
When you cannot sleep at night, have you ever thought maybe it’s God saying “We need to talk and you now have time.
Always remember to fall asleep with a dream and wake up with a purpose.
Two cows are standing in a field.
One cow says “MOOOOO!”
The other cow says pretty much the same thing.
A birth certificate is an apology from the government that you are now indentured and a social security number that you are no longer a sovereign.
When you want a picture taken with a celebrity at a concert or event
just make sure you shave your head and wear a hospital gown, works for me every time.
Baby, baby, baby ooh!
Mom: *walks in* Are you listening to Justin Bieber?
Daughter: No, I’m watching porn.
Mom: Oh, thank goodness.
I’ve never enjoyed my surprise birthday parties because
all I can think about is how good my friends are at lying to my face.
Q: What do you call a Spaniard with a lowered car?
All I wish is that the nights when we are together would never end. When we are apart, I cannot bear it. Good night, my love.
Man should forget his anger before he lies down to sleep. – Mahatma Gandhi
All I wish that I could be there to say good night instead of sending you this message.
Night is to see the dreams and day is to make them true.
So its good to sleep now and see the dreams. Good Night!
Why did the cowboy buy a weiner dog?
To get along little doggy!
God’s guidance is like a small lamp in a dark forest… Doesn’t show everything at once… But gives enough light for the next step to be safe. Goodnight!
What did Hitler get his niece for her birthday? A easy bake oven but with the Jews sold separate.
The government shutdown has officially lasted longer than any of Taylor Swift’s relationships.
Q: Whats the difference between a smart Spaniard and a unicorn?
A: Nothing, they’re both fictional characters